All in his eyes
by Nix1978
Summary: This is a sequel to my other story 'Coming Home'. Doyle is dead and Emily has returned to her friends. Emily and Derek have some 'stuff' to work through.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a sequel to my other story…. 'Coming Home'. 'Coming Home' dealt with the whole team's reaction to finding out the news Emily was alive and them seeing her for the first time since the Dolye saga. This story is all about Emily and Derek and how they work through their stuff. Thanks for reading.**

In the car, driving back to her place, Garcia looked over at Emily in the passenger seat. She was staring out the window not saying anything for a while.

"Hey hun, you doing ok?" She said putting her hand on Emily's knee.

Emily turned and smiled at her friend, "Yes Pen, I'm ok. Just tired. This is all pretty overwhelming."

"Sure… well, we better lay off the tequila shots tonight then eh?" Garcia said with a wink.

Emily laughed and then her mind wandered again… "Pen… how's Morgan been? He seemed really quiet earlier."

Morgan was also on the way to Garcia's with Reid. It had taken some persuading on Garcia's part. She pretty much had to emotionally blackmail him but Hotch would be going home to Jack, JJ to Will and Henry and Rossi back to his latest squeeze. Garcia was determined no-one was going to be on their own tonight.

Garcia stalled.

"Pen, just tell me. I didn't expect any of this to be a walk in the park. I know I'm going to hear some stuff I don't like."

Garcia shook her head, moisture appearing in her eyes, "Emily, do you know what? I feel so awful… but I don't know."

"What do you mean?"

"He's been so strong for me and Spence and I've been so upset that I think he just poured everything he had into being there for us. I tried to get him to talk to me but he just clammed up and I didn't have the energy to push him. I know he beats himself up for not saving you…. well, I guess he did. He just didn't know it."

Emily hung her head and felt the guilt rise up. She knew he would have felt that way. He always wanted to save people and always beat himself up if he didn't. His final words had echoed in her head for the past few months and not being able to him what they had meant to her had been so hard. She remembered every single one of them.

.,.,.,.,.,,.,,..,.,.,.,

At Garcia's, Morgan was sat on the sofa with a bottle of beer in his hand that he had been nursing for about a hour taking two sips at most from it. Garcia and Reid sat on the floor with Emily asking her a million and one questions about where she had been and what she had been doing. She didn't have much to tell them though. It had been hotels or crummy bedsits for her, laid up, just trying to recover from her injuries. She really didn't want to talk about it as it had been a miserable six months, but she guessed they wouldn't have anything happy to talk about either so she stuck with their questioning as best she could.

Garcia watched as Emily looked at Morgan. He briefly glanced back at her and tried to force a smile, but it never really materialised leaving Emily looking dejected.

"Spence, come on….." Garcia instructed. "…. We need pizza. This one here needs fattening up."

"Why don't we just order it in?" Reid asked confused.

"Because I know this place downtown that does the best pizza and they don't deliver. We can only have the best tonight right?"

"Downtown is miles away." Reid said sounding like a whining child, obviously not wanting to spend anymore time away from Emily.

"Just get your coat… We'll be back in a bit you two." Garcia said winking at Emily.

Emily looked back at her with scared eyes. Being left alone with Morgan right now wasn't exactly a thought to relish. She watched as they left, rooted to the spot. She felt the nervousness rise in her stomach.

She turned and looked at Morgan. He continued to look at his beer bottle as if waiting for it to do something. He obviously wasn't going to make the first move.

Emily stood up, grabbing her stomach as she did, wincing quietly in pain. This caused Morgan to snap out of his trance, "You ok?" He asked concerned.

She nodded, "Yeah, I'm fine…..it's just still healing."

He held her gaze for a few seconds…. He seemed to be searching for something. She wandered if he was trying to decide whether or not to believe her, after all, everything she had said to him in those last few days had pretty much been a lie.

She sat next to him on the sofa, turning her body so she was facing him.

She wanted to touch him, to put her hand on his, but he wasn't inviting right now.

"Derek….please say something."

He continued looking at the bottle. She wanted to snatch that bloody bottle out of his hand and throw it against the wall.

"Derek…."

She watched him. He closed his eyes, rubbed his forehead as if he were in pain and slowly shook his head. She reached out and touched his arm gently, her hands shaking.

As she did he suddenly stood up as if she had electrocuted him… "I can't do this…." He said. His voice breaking.

"Can't do what…? Derek, please….Shout at me. Scream at me…..anything, but say something."

He went and stood at the other side of the room, his back to her.

"I….." He cleared his throat with a cough. "… I don't know what to say Emily."

"Tell me you're angry with me. Tell me you hate with me…Just tell me."

With his back still facing her he said….. "I don't hate you Emily…. I….I'm just…."

She saw his breathing rate increase. His chest was rising and falling heavier than before and he put a hand against the wall as if to steady himself.

She stood up and slowly walked over to him. He felt her presence behind him. He could smell her. It took him back to when they were partners…..he had never forgotten her scent. It was still the same….. Still beautiful and consuming. That is how he had tried to remember her…..not as she was in the warehouse _that_ day.

She saw his shoulders slump forward and his head hang down.

"Derek….." she said softly. "…. Please turn around."

She placed her hand on his waist… "Hey…." She said softly.

He turned around slowly and looked into her eyes. Tears were streaming down his face and the screams in his eyes were deafening. She felt a pain in the pit of her stomach. She had never seen him like this before. She'd seen him angry, hurt, frustrated, upset, but not like this. Not breaking down.

With tears welling in her eyes, she took a tentative step towards him, waiting for him to take a step back from her. But he didn't move, so she took another step and the next thing she knew he was in her arms, sobbing. It was as if he let go of something. He felt heavy on her, like he needed _her_ to support him.

She placed one hand on the back of his head and one behind his back and she felt the vibrations of his body against hers.

For him, it was the first time he had allowed himself to cry in front of anyone since the funeral. The only person he had felt like he could cry in front of had been Garcia, but he had never allowed himself to. She needed him to be strong.

But now he was exhausted and he couldn't be strong anymore. Now that she was safe he didn't need to be…. but it wasn't over.

Some how they managed to manoeuvre themselves back to the sofa. Derek wiped away his tears and sat with his head in his hands. Emily sat just a couple of inches away, not too close, giving him space to breath…..

"Derek, listen….. I'm so sorry for what I did…..before I left that day. I know I lied to you and please believe when I tell you that it was so hard. I wanted to tell you so many times, but it was my fight. I didn't want to involve any of you… you saw what he was capable of. I only did it to protect you all….. you do know that?"

He nodded his head, but didn't say anything.

"If you're angry with me, just say. I know you are and I can't blame you."

He started shaking his head… his voice was coarse…."I don't want to be angry anymore Emily…It feels like I've been angry forever."

"With me?" She asked.

"At first yes…. I was angry because you didn't trust me enough to tell me what was going on. I was angry that you'd looked me in the eyes and said everything was ok when you knew you'd be walking away from me in just a few seconds. I was angry with you because I'd known you for five years and I knew nothing about this side of you and I was angry that…." he stopped and looked her in the eyes. "….. that you slept with Doyle."

He let that last thought linger for a few seconds and then continued. "….But then I realised…..I knew I was wrong….. and I was angry with myself for feeling that way towards you. When I….." She could tell he was struggling to stop himself letting go again. "…. When I held you, waiting for the medics, I was angry with myself for waiting till you were dying in my arms to tell you how I felt and even then, I didn't say it all. And then when JJ said you were gone… I felt everything implode. I couldn't breath. I've spent the last six months being angry…..not with you…with myself for everything."

"And what about now? Now that you know the truth?"

"You know what….?" His eyes meeting hers, pleading for answers. "….I don't know. But what I do know is that I'm more happy than you could ever know that you are alive. Please don't think for one second that I'm not. My world without you in it has been…well it's been hell and I never want to feel that way again."

"I don't know what to say Derek…I'm sorry…. But I know that's not enough."

He shook his head….."No, I don't want you to be sorry. I know you must have been through hell… were you on your own all this time?"

She hung her head, feeling herself start to shake, trying to fight the tears…."Yes, I had to be. I had to leave any trace of Emily Prentiss behind."

"How could they let you be on your own? JJ and Hotch….? We could have protected you."

"Come on Derek, you know that's not true…would you seriously of been willing to put Penelope and Spence in danger?"

His voice softened, knowing she was right….."No, of course not, but I am not willing to accept there wasn't an alternative to leaving you all alone….and allowing us to believe you were gone." Even now, he couldn't say the word 'dead.'

She knew this was probably the exact reason that Hotch and JJ didn't tell him. Not because they didn't trust him, but because he would have fought them every step of the way. All he ever wanted to do was protect people, especially those he cared about.

"Well I guess that's something we're all going to have to try and work through Derek….. If you want to of course."

He looked at her and she looked exhausted….. He thought about what she must have been through all alone for the last few months. They had all suffered, but they'd had each other. She had had no-one, just as in those last few weeks before she 'died'.

"Hey…." He said resting one hand on her shoulder, rubbing it gently. "… Come here."

He opened his arms to her and she didn't hesitate in letting herself melt into his chest.

"God, this is good….. To feel you again Em."

She didn't respond…..He could just feel the wetness from her tears on his shirt.

They sat for a while in silence.

He was still battling with his feelings… a mixture of hurt, anger and confusion towards JJ Hotch and if he were honest, Emily too….. Joy, happiness, even ecstasy from just seeing her face again. And then sadness… sadness because of what she had been through on her own and he knew she probably still felt alone. He wanted to fix that, but he knew that wouldn't be easy.

She contemplated how the next few weeks may go. Sure, everyone was pleased to see her now, but she knew they couldn't just erase what they had been through….. How they had felt. Even if they tried to shield it from her, they would all be wary of her, some more than others. She had a lot to make up to them.

As they heard the key in the door, they both sat up and Garcia came bounding in…"Hey guys. Grubs up." As she walked past her two friends on the way to the kitchen, she could see the redness of their eyes. She figured this could only be a good thing…..Derek must have opened up…..even just a little and as both of them were still there, it couldn't have gone too badly.

Not long after, they all went to bed. Emily lay there in the dark exhausted, but unable to sleep. Her mind was in overdrive. She got up to get some water and tried to tip toe past what she though was a sleeping Morgan on the sofa… but he wasn't.

"Hey, you ok? Can't sleep?" She heard him whisper.

"Ouch! Shit!" Emily shrieked.

Morgan jumped up, "What, what is it?"

"Nothing, I just stubbed my toe. Couldn't see where I was going."

Morgan sniggered.

"What are you laughing at?"

"Emily, last time I saw you, you had a…" He stopped himself, realising what he was about to say and it wasn't really joke material….It wouldn't be, not for a long time. "…..Well let's just say, I didn't think a stubbed toe would phase you. Come here. Sit down for a bit."

He moved her over to the sofa…..She was perfectly capable of walking herself, but he couldn't help himself.

She sat down and examined her toe…."Damn it. It's bleeding."

"Wait a second." Morgan walked off and appeared a few seconds later with a wet towel and a band aid.

"Here, let me." He said taking hold of her ankle. He proceeded to clean up the mess that was her toe.

She didn't know what possessed her to ask at this moment… in the dark and in the middle of the night, but it had played on her mind since their conversation earlier.

"Derek, earlier, you said you were angry with me for sleeping with Doyle…. Why?"

**To be continued…**


	2. Chapter 2

**All In His Eyes Chapter 2**

Derek kept hold of her ankle as if letting go would cause him to fall a thousand feet. He continued to wipe away the blood. It took him a while to allow his gaze to meet hers and she knew not to push him.

"I…..I just hated the thought of you with him….."

"You know I only did it because it was my job right?"

"I know, but…..how could you let him…..?" He trailed off not really knowing how to end that sentence. He didn't want to think about what he was about to say.

"I'm not proud of what I did Derek and it wasn't easy, but it didn't mean anything."

"You must have been pretty convincing though. The guy wanted to marry you right?" She swallowed hard, realising that there wasn't much her team didn't know about what she had done back then. There was a minor hint of accusation and resentment in his voice which took her aback slightly. Normally she would be mad at him for a comment like that, but right now was different. He deserved to be able to let this out. She thought for a while about how to answer him.

"Derek, I was in deep. I can't deny that. I had to go much deeper than I'd anticipated and before I knew it, it was too late to turn back. I had to do things that made my skin crawl, and believe me I was scared to death at times….most of the time actually. But if I'd of let my mask slip he would have killed me there and then with his bare hands. If I wasn't convincing, I'd have been dead years ago."

"I know." He whispered, looking back down to her foot.

"Are you really angry with me for that?"

"I was…"

He looked at her with a pained expression…..

"Why?" she asked softly.

"Why? Because I can't stand the thought of his….. a killer's hands all over you… He was a monster."

Emily frowned….."And that's the reason?"

"If you want me to say it Emily, I will…. I was jealous. I know that sounds pathetic because I didn't even know you then, but I was jealous. Ok?"

He contemplated getting up and walking away, but he didn't. He was still holding onto her ankle and as silly as it sounded, he didn't want to let go.

There was silence for what felt like minutes, but it was only actually a few seconds.

Emily leant forward and prised his hand from her ankle and let her foot drop to the floor. She held his hand with both of hers and placed a feather light kiss on the back of it. That kiss sent shivers down his spine, but he remained rooted to the spot, not having a clue what to do after his confession.

"Derek, look at me…. That was a long time ago and believe me. I don't make a habit of sleeping with people I don't care about….. I'm not cold hearted. It was a necessary evil at the time."

"You don't have to explain yourself to me Em."

"You're right…..I don't have to, but I want to. Contrary to what you believe, what everyone probably believes, I do care about what you think of me. The last six months I have thought of nothing other than what lying to you all was doing to you and I dreamt of the day I'd be able to come back to you, but I also dreaded it…. How can you forgive me or ever trust me again?"

He didn't answer. His silence just confirmed to her that there was a long way to go before Derek Morgan would fully trust her again. She searched his eyes for forgiveness and she knew he was trying to give it, but they weren't quite there yet.

"Derek, is there anything you want to ask me? Anything?" She thought she may regret making that offer, but she wanted to make this right.

Morgan looked deep in thought. He had a million questions he wanted to ask her, but didn't even know where to start. There was one thing he wanted to know though, above everything else….."Em, _do_ you trust me…..did you ever?"

"Do you remember what you said to me in the car that day about trust?"

"I'll never forget it."

"Well, you were right about not me not trusting anyone….up until I met you that was. It took a little while, but I did trust you completely…. With _my_ life that was, but with your own? If I told you what was going on, I know what you would have done. You would have made it your fight too….. You would have done everything in your power to take Doyle down and I wasn't prepared to take that risk. Everyone around me was dropping like flies and I didn't want you to be the next. Me not telling you was nothing to do with trust….. You were the one who noticed the most something was going on and I wanted to tell you so many times. Llooking you in the eye that day in the bull pen and then walking away was so hard. All I wanted to do was stay with you, because I knew I was safe with you…I always was."

"You should of stayed…with me." And he turned his gaze down to the floor.

"Derek, I know you're probably never going to accept the decisions I, JJ and Hotch made over the past few months, but I really hope we can get past that…" She stroked the side of his face with the back of her hand. "… I don't want to lose you again."

He looked back up at her….."No chance… We will get past this…" He said forcing a little smile. "…Come on, you're exhausted and so am I. We really should get some sleep. We've got all the time in the world to talk."

"Yeah, you're right."

He held her hand as she stood up as if she needed help to balance and once she was up he let his hand linger around her fingers just a few seconds longer that he really needed to.

"Goodnight Derek." She said leaning in to give him a small kiss on his cheek. "…..Sweet dreams."

"You too Em." And he watched her walk to her room.

As they both lay down and closed their eyes, they felt safe… Even if they didn't have sweet dreams tonight…even if the nightmares came again, they knew that when they woke up, everything would be ok because she was back home where she belonged.

,,,,,,,,,,,,….,,,,,,,,,,,,,….,,,,,,,,,,,,,…

The following day, the team were all called in early. Hotch had a case that they couldn't turn down involving a missing child. No-one wanted to leave Emily alone, especially Garcia who tried to convince her to come to the BAU with her and sit in her office. Garcia guessed this was what separation anxiety felt like. She was afraid if she let Emily out of her sight again, she'd disappear.

"Pen, I'll be fine. JJ's picking me up in a bit and we're going to sort my place out."

"Yes, that's something else we have to talk about. I'm not happy with you staying on your own."

Emily laughed, "Penelope Garcia, I really do love you you know? We'll talk later. I promise."

The old Emily would have argued. Everyone knew that. They could all see she had changed….. softened.…..just a little.

JJ and Emily spent the day moving stuff into her new place. JJ had secretly stored all of Emily's belongings when she went away, always hopeful that she would return. By the evening, the removal company had dropped off everything and the girls had managed to at least sort her bedroom and living room out. The rest would wait till another day.

At about 7pm there was a knock at the door. Emily opened it and was greeted by the beaming smile of Garcia and Reid. Morgan was stood behind with an apologetic look on his face.

"So, you're coming back to my place tonight aren't you Em?" Garcia started.

"I really want to stay here…..the longer I put off staying here, the harder it will be. All my stuff's here."

Garcia looked disappointed, "Oh, ok. But you don't want to be on your own do you?"

Truth was, she didn't really want to be on her own, but she knew she had to try and get back to normal as soon as possible. She looked at Garcia, then Reid and then lastly Morgan, hoping he would help her out with trying to subdue Garcia.

As if reading her mind he stepped in, "I'll stay if you like? My back is still sore from last night, so one more sleep on a sofa won't hurt." He said winking at Garcia.

That pleased Garcia no end from the look on her face and she was happy leaving Emily in the capable hands of Morgan.

After Garcia and Reid had left Emily turned to Morgan who was stood in the middle of the living room looking a little lost, "Thanks, she wouldn't have taken no for an answer….. but you don't have to stay if you don't want to."

His face turned from neutral to a frown, "Don't you want me to stay?"

Emily thought for a moment and then couldn't help but let out a little laugh... "We're not very good at this are we?"

His face softened into a smile, "No I guess not."

"Derek, I would like it if you stayed. I'd rather not be alone. I've had enough of that lately"

"Of course, no problem." His soft, gentle tone that she had heard so many times when they worked together came out. It was the reassuring voice he used on victims and her occasionally when he was trying to help her or calm her down.

"Ok, there's not much in the cupboards. Do you want to order take out? I'm just going to jump in the shower…..it's been a long day."

"Sure." And he gave her a sweet smile.

Both of them sat on the sofa looking at the food on the table…."Jeez, there's so much food left over…..do you like Chinese for breakfast Derek?"

He let out a little laugh…."There's only so much left because you hardly ate anything. Garcia's right, you need fattening up."

Without thinking he playfully touched her stomach causing her T-shirt to shift a little. As it did, his gaze wandered down her beautiful, smooth neck and down to the top of her T-shirt….…and then it all came flooding back to him. That day in the warehouse….. He could just see the tiniest part of a scar peeping out above the rounded neckline.

Her eyes widened and for a brief moment he thought she was screaming at him, but not with her voice…with her eyes. He saw her chest rising and falling heavier…..quicker…. and her hands start to shake.

He shuffled along the sofa so he was closer to her and took hold of her hands.

"Oh my God Emily, I'm so sorry…Hey, it's ok."

She looked at him, a tear running down her cheek.

He shook his head and closed his eyes…." I'm such an idiot." He muttered under his breath.

"No, no you're not. It's ok." she said, her voice almost breaking.

"No it's not ok. You went through hell with that man and I'm worrying about how I'm feeling…. I knew what he did to you…..I saw…."

She looked down at his hands holding hers and the tears started to flow. He felt droplets fall on his hands. He put his arms around her and she almost fell into his hug.

"I'm so sorry for what he did, but it'll be ok."

"He branded me Derek….that's for life. It's so ugly. I'm so…"

He shook his head and pulled out of the hug so he was looking at her. He wiped away the tears on her face and looked her straight in the eyes….."Hey, those scars are beautiful…."  
She looked at him confused, tears still running down her face.

"Do you know why….? Because they're a part of you….. and you have never looked more beautiful to me than right now."

And that was the truth….. right now she was everything to him. Over the years he had seen many sides to Emily Prentiss….tough, strong, intelligent, funny….. the list goes on. But right at that moment he saw her vulnerable and scared and that completed their jigsaw. All he'd wanted was for her to open up to him…and she finally was, which meant she did really trust him.

They sat quietly for a while until Emily felt Morgan's head resting on hers as he was falling asleep.

She shifted a little and sat upright…."Hey, Derek, time for bed."

"Oh ok…." A sleepy voice said. "…..Have you got a blanket or something?"

"Sure, I'll just go find one."

Emily went into her bedroom and stood and just looked at her bed….. it was _her_ bed. She hadn't had her own for a while. She looked around the room which was pretty bare and suddenly felt alone again. This didn't feel like home…..not yet. But that was to be expected. Her mind wandered to being back in those hotel rooms, all alone and in physical pain…..it sent a shivers all over her body.

She jumped out of her thoughts as she felt Morgan's hand on her arm.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it's fine, I was just…. Well I don't know what I was just doing."

"So, have you got a blanket?"

"Er….. Derek, could I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"I know this sounds a bit weird, but would you stay in here with me tonight….I just don't feel like being on my own."

Morgan was surprised by the request, but didn't want to show it in case she thought he wasn't fond of the idea.

"Of course…..let me just go get washed up. I'll be in in a minute."

Emily climbed into her bed and curled up. She was so exhausted that she was already drifting off as Morgan came into the room. Although she was half asleep, she was well aware of his chest up against her back. He hadn't got under the covers…..she knew they were a little way off from that yet, but he did drape one of his big arms around her and gently placed his hand on her stomach, right where one of her scars were. She didn't know if he'd done that on purpose, but she suspected he did.

It was the first time in a long time she had fallen asleep without feeling scared.


	3. Chapter 3

They both awoke to the sound of Morgan's phone alarm going off. They were still in the exact position they had gone to sleep in. Morgan rolled on to his back, leant over to turn the alarm off and then stared at the ceiling, waiting for himself to wake up properly. Emily turned to face him so she was lying on her other side, her head still on the pillow. He turned his head so he was facing her as well… "Hey." He whispered.

"Hey." She said softly

"You sleep ok?"

She gave a little laugh, "Actually, I haven't slept that well since…well, I can't really remember….. Thanks Derek."

"Always." He said winking at her.

It had been a bit of a private joke they'd had since he'd said that to her a couple of years back. They laughed about it, but she knew he meant it every time he said it.

"Is it alright if I grab a shower? I've got my go bag here. It'll save me going home before going to work."

"Of course…help yourself."

Emily was making them coffee and toast when Morgan joined her after his shower.

"So, what you got planned today while the rest of us are slaving away?"

"Oh, I'll just sort this place out I guess."

As she handed him the plate he could see her hand was shaking. He took the plate off her and set it down on the table.

"Come here." He said reaching out to her hand. He enveloped it in his own…."Why are you shaking?"

She pulled her hand away, "It's nothing…..I'm fine. Probably just the medication I'm on. It's pretty strong."

"Well you weren't shaking sat on the sofa last night and you weren't shaking in bed. So why now?"

She didn't answer. She didn't have an answer. Well not one she wanted to admit to anyway. He looked at her with a frown and she could see the thought processes going on behind his eyes.

"You're shaking because you're going to be on your own aren't you?"

She looked down and was about to protest but he started again before she could…."And don't lie to me Em. Please, just tell me."

The phrase, 'don't lie to me' stung her a little. Even though she knew he didn't mean it in an accusatory way, she was pretty gutted that he assumed that's exactly what she'd do. She knew that the only way they were going to rebuild what they had was going to be for both of them to be completely honest….. That could mean admitting to some stuff that they'd rather not, but it was a small price to pay for what it would lead to.

She looked down at the floor, "Ok, you got me….. Yes, it's because you're leaving, but I'll be ok. I've just got to deal with it."

"True, but not today. Not if you don't want to. Why don't you come with me?"

She looked up and smiled at him, "Derek, that's really sweet, and whilst they have 'bring your kids to work day' I don't think it stretches to 'bring your screwed up friend to work day' does it?"

That made him chuckle…."Firstly, you're not screwed up and secondly, you kind of work there too."

"I did….." She was interrupted mid sentence by her phone ringing. She picked it up and saw Hotch's name….. "It's Hotch." And she looked at Morgan as if asking what she should do.

"Well answer it then."

He watched her as she answered the call, and could obviously only hear one side of the conversation,

"Hotch….Hi"

….

"What today?"

…

"What does she want?"

…

"Oh ok."

…

"No I'll be fine. Thanks."

She put the phone down and looked at Morgan, "Hotch says Strauss wants to see me today."

"What for?"

"Don't know…looks like I'll be coming into work with you after all though."

"Good." He said with a smile on his face.

The two of them walked into the bull pen, Emily being greeted by an over excited Garcia. It took her a couple of minutes before she could shake her off and go to Hotch's office. Morgan watched Emily walk off desperate to go with her….. He didn't want to be left out of the loop anymore, but knew it wasn't his place to tag along.

As he watched, Rossi joined him…"It's good to see her back here isn't it?"

"Yeah it is….. Do you know what Hotch wants with her?"

"He's been talking to Strauss about her coming back."

"And?"

"And it is possible. Officially Emily was never sacked and didn't resign."

"No, she died Rossi."

"Top brass…. and I mean right at the top…. knew what happened. In a nutshell Morgan, she may be able to come back….. if she wants to of course."

After about half hour, Emily walked out of Hotch's office to a sea of expectant faces. Morgan, Rossi, Reid and Garcia were all bunched together by her old desk, looking at her.

"Ok guys…. I feel like a freak show with you all staring at me."

"So, what did he say?" Reid asked, beating the others to it.

"Well, he said Strauss says if I pass the physical and the phsych evaluation I can come back."

"That's great Emily." Garcia gushed.

"Don't get too excited Pen. I'm no where near as fit as I need to be physically and I have no doubt Strauss thinks I haven't got a chance in hell of passing the phsych tests."

"We can coach you through them…If we can't, no one can." Rossi added.

"Yeah, and Morgan will work on your fitness right?" Reid said looking at him.

Morgan nodded in agreement.

"Guys, I really appreciate it, but I don't know if I should come back…" She continued quickly before anyone had the chance to question her. "…. Plus, I don't trust Strauss. There's no way she'd let me back that easily….. I've got to see her now… I think I'd rather face Doyle."  
Emily laughed, but the others didn't. They all just looked at her…. not in horror of what she just said, but more in sadness. May be it was too soon for jokes like that.

"Ok, wish me luck." She turned and walked off to a chorus of 'good lucks'.

Garcia turned to the three men with tears in her eyes, "Why wouldn't she want to come back to us?"

"She didn't say she didn't want to, she said may be she shouldn't. There's a difference. She probably thinks we won't trust her." Rossi replied.

"Well you know it's all our job to make sure we show her we will right?" Garcia looked at Morgan pleadingly. Morgan put his arm around her…."We'll try our best Penelope."

Everyone went back to work, expecting the meeting with Strauss to take a while. After about only thirty seconds of Garcia leaving the bull pen, she came running in, "Derek, come quick!"

He shot up from his desk, Rossi and Reid following suit… "What's wrong?"

Garcia was struggling to get her breath back…. "They've got her."

"Penelope, will you slow down, you're not making any sense." Morgan said.

"Emily. They've arrested her."

"What? Where are they?"

"They're just coming down the corridor."

The three men looked out of the glass doors horrified to see Emily being escorted by two men, handcuffed behind her back. Morgan started to run towards them….."Reid, go get Hotch now!"

Morgan blasted through the doors and stood in front of Emily and the two men who looked like hired goons, blocking their path to the elevator. Strauss was a few steps behind them.

"Who the hell are you?" Morgan demanded.

Strauss moved around to speak on behalf of the two men… "Agent Morgan. These are detectives from the local Police Department. Miss Prentiss has some questions she needs to answer."

Hotch joined them and Morgan looked to him, "Did you know about this?"

"No absolutely not….." Hotch turned to Strauss, "What are the charges?"

"No charges yet, but Miss Prentiss was running around with firearms and other weapons she wasn't licensed to carry before she _disappeared_. She must account for that."

"Miss Prentiss…..?" Morgan started. "….And what are the handcuffs for? What the hell do you think she's going to do?"

"Well, I don't know what she's capable of Agent Morgan." Strauss said, almost with a smirk on her face.

Morgan went to say something back. Lucky for him, Hotch interjected…."Chief Strauss, where will she be taken?"

As much as Hotch wanted to ball this woman out right now the same as Morgan, he knew it wouldn't be what was best for the team or Emily. They were already heavily under the spotlight and questioning her in front of the local police wouldn't go down too well.

"Aaron, she will be taken care of, don't worry about that. She's had her rights." Strauss said, letting him know there would be no more answers from her.

"Derek, I'll be fine….don't worry." Emily said trying to force a smile. She could see he was about to explode.

"No talking." One of the 'goons' said almost shoving Emily forward.

"You're really pushing it man." Derek said in the 'goon's' face, but he just smirked and led Emily to the elevator.  
As the doors closed and Emily disappeared, Hotch turned to Strauss, "That was a really dirty trick you pulled. You could have just asked me to bring her in."

"This is a formality Aaron. In the circumstances, I'm sure no charges will be bought, but we must be seen to co-operate with the local police."

"And what you said, about her coming back? That still stands?"

"Let's see what comes of this."

Rossi stepped forward, "Erin, you must have some idea of what they're going to do with her."

"Dave, I'm not saying anything else." And she walked away back to her office.

Morgan went straight to the local police station where Emily was being held after finishing work and waited for her. He was under strict instructions to call everyone as soon as she was released… _if_ she was released.

It was 1am when she finally emerged into the waiting area. Morgan stood up as she walked towards him. She looked exhausted.

As if it were the most natural thing in the world and as if she'd done it a thousand times, she walked straight up to him and fell into his arms. He snaked his arms around her waist and kissed her on her forehead.

"What happened Emily?"

"Well, they interviewed me for three hours and then let me go…. I have to come back in a few days, but I think it'll be ok."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Can we just get out of here?"

"Of course. Come on, car's out front."

They walked back into Emily's place and Morgan set his go bag on the table. She looked over to it and then to him…."You know, you don't have to stay. I don't want to impose."

"Impose...?" and he chuckled. "….Do you have any idea how much I've missed you? Truth is, I don't want to let you out of my sight Emily."

"Oh….." She didn't know how to respond to him, so he continued.

"And what is all this rubbish about not coming back to the BAU?"

Emily shook her head…."Do you really think everyone can get past what I did? What if everyone watches me all the time, or checks up on me? That's not how a team should run."

"No it isn't, and may be it would be like that at first…. But not because they don't trust you, but because they'll be worried about you."

"And what about you? Will you trust me to have your back?"

He took a few steps towards her…."Do you know how many times you saved my life in the five years we worked together Emily?"

She thought for a second….."No."

"Neither do I…. and that's because you did so many times I can't remember. When we had that shoot out with Doyle and his men, you put yourself between me and them didn't you?"

She bowed her head, "Yes, as soon as they started I knew it was them. I couldn't let you take a bullet for my mess."

"Exactly…..and even though I would take a bullet for you any time, I also know you'd do it for me. So in answer to your question….. yes, I will trust you to have my back. Besides, if I don't convince you to come back, Garcia will never forgive me and I can't live without her cupcakes."

Emily laughed… "Well, I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. It may not be possible….. especially if Strauss gets her way."

"We." Morgan replied.

Emily looked at him confused….."I'm sorry, what? We?"

"You said, '_I'll_ cross that bridge when _I_ get to it.' It's not 'I', it's 'we'."

He took a couple more steps towards her and she looked into his eyes…."You can forgive me….. just like that?"

"There's nothing to forgive Emily… But if there was, would you want me to?"

She stared into his eyes, and she knew he meant it. "Yes. Of course."

"I said the other day that I was angry with myself for not telling you the whole truth about how I felt about you even when you lay dying in my arms… well, I don't want to make that mistake again."

He lifted his hand to stroke her hair. She closed her eyes and took in the feel of his strong, yet soft hands. She swallowed hard, nervous of what was going to happen next. She didn't want to mess this up….not again. Still with her eyes close, she felt his soft lips on hers. She opened her eyes and met his staring right back at her. She let herself melt into the kiss and gently ran her tongue along his bottom lip. She felt his pressing for permission to enter her mouth, so she parted her lips and granted that access. She could feel the last six months of pain and hurt pouring out of him. The kiss became deep and desperate, like they were making up for the past five years.

When they broke from the kiss, he held her hands with his and whispered to her, "Do you understand….now?"

She smiled and nodded

"Is that ok?" He asked.

"Very." And she kissed him again.

They spent the night as they had before…..nothing more than a kiss happened. That probably wouldn't last long, but neither of them were in a hurry. They had waited over 5 years after all.


	4. Chapter 4

Derek awoke the following morning and slowly crept out of the bed, trying not to wake a sleeping Emily. After showering, he went to make some breakfast and a coffee to take up to her…. he knew she wasn't one for eating first thing. As he sat at the breakfast table his phone rang out and he saw Garcia's face appear on the screen.

"Hey baby girl…. What's up?"

"We've got a case. You've got to fly out in an hour."

"You're kidding? Where to?"

"Alabama."

"Jees, the timing couldn't be worse Penelope."

"I know….. How is she?"

"She's ok. I just don't want to leave her on her own right now."

"She won't be… I'm not coming with you. I'll make sure she's ok Derek."

"I know you will. I'll be in as soon as I can." He finished with a sigh.

He crept back up the stairs to the bedroom with the coffee, and perched on the edge of the bed. He gently put his hand on Emily's back as she was lying on her side, facing away from him.

"Hey…. Emily. Wake up."

Slowly she stirred and turned over to face him. A tired smile crept across her face and he couldn't believe how beautiful she looked. It made telling her he was going away even harder.

"I got you coffee."

"Thanks." She looked him up and down…. "You're all ready."

"Yeah, I've got to go to work now."

He saw the look of disappointment creep on her face.

"Ok Derek…. I'll be fine. Have a good day."

He just looked at her and she could see something was wrong…. "What's the matter?"

He took a deep breath, "Em, I've got to go away. We've got a case in Alabama."

"Oh….. Well it can't be helped. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. Really. You've got to concentrate on the case."

"I really don't want to leave you."

She put her palm on his cheek and pushed herself up on her other arm to place a kiss on his lips…. "It's ok. I know. But honestly, I have to get over this and this will give me the opportunity to do it."

"Ok, but Garcia's going to want to come round. Promise me you'll let her…. and promise me if you need anything you'll call her."

"I promise…. Stop worrying."

He gathered her up in his arms and buried his face into her hair. He could feel her shaking just a little. He kissed her neck and then pulled out of the hug. She tried to wipe away the tear from her cheek before he could see, but she was too late. He removed her hand and rubbed her cheek with his thumb…. "I'm right on the end of the phone ok? You ring whenever you want, even in the middle of the night."

Shaking her head…"God I don't know why I'm being like this. I feel so stupid."

"You're not stupid…" He gave her another small kiss on the lips. "You ok?"

She nodded and smiled at him.

"I'll make sure we catch that unsub real quick." And he winked at her as he got up.

It took all he had to stop looking at her, turn around and walk away.

After he left she curled back up on the bed and covered herself in the duvet. Tears fell down her cheeks…. She felt ridiculous. She had never been like this, but truth was she didn't want him to go anywhere. Right now he made her feel safe. She wasn't sure what from…. Doyle was dead. There was no-one to hurt her anymore. All she knew was that her heart beat much calmer when he was there than when he was not.

As predicted, Garcia showed up at Emily's place that evening with several different cakes she had baked the day before.

"Penelope, how much do you think we can eat in one night?"

"Oh, we don't have to eat them all today…. You can save some for when Derek gets back." A smile appearing across her face.

"I don't know what you mean Pen."

"Emily Prentiss, that boy has pined after you for the last six months. He was broken and since you've been back he's not left your side. Don't tell me there's nothing there. I know him….. and you!"

"Well, I have to admit he has been good to me since I got back. I thought he'd never forgive me for what I did to you all."

"He loves you…. of course he'll forgive you."

"Whoa there Penelope…. Love. Slow down."

"Are you telling me you don't love him…..? Actually, don't answer that. The first person you tell should be him."

Emily laughed… "Penelope Garcia, you are a wicked woman….and I've missed you like crazy. Come here." She took her in her arms…. "I love _you_. That's for sure."

Over the next couple of days Garcia camped out at Emily's until Derek got back off the case. Emily didn't even put up a fight, she just let Garcia take over, allowing her to mother her. That wasn't something she was used to or would normally want, but right now she was happy to accept it.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Emily was sat on her sofa when the door bell went. She jumped up to answer it and smiled as she opened the door. Derek didn't say anything, just pulled her into his big, strong arms. As he did, she felt all the anxiety of the last few days, pour out of her body.

"You ok?" He whispered into her ear.

"I am now…. I got some good news today as well."

He pulled away, but not letting go of her waist and looked at her….. "Oh yeah, what's that?"

"The Police rang. There'll be no charges. That's all over."

"Good….. I should think so though, the whole thing was ridiculous."

"Only problem is, I now have to go and see Strauss tomorrow….. Well I do if I want to think about coming back."

"Emily, just go and see her. You can change your mind at any time. As much as I don't want you to have to face that bitch again, it's the only way you can come back….. and that's what we all want."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

The next day Emily sat outside Strauss' office, tapping her foot. It was only a few days ago she was in exactly the same position and ended up being carted out of the place in cuffs. She detested this woman and had no idea how this conversation was going to go, but she knew she had to hold it together or she would blow any chance of coming back.

After being summoned, Emily opened the door to Strauss' office with the confidence she always had….. She wasn't going to let this woman break her.

"Take a seat Emily."

Emily wasn't quite sure what to call the woman. She wasn't an Agent, so ma'am wouldn't be appropriate….. So she said nothing and took a seat.

"Agent Hotchner seems to think you want to come back. Is that right?"

"Well, yes. If that's possible?"

"Emily do you really think that it would be a good idea? I mean will you even be able to get through the physical with the state you are in?"

"State I'm in?"

"You suffered a huge physical trauma. I take it you're still recovering?"

"Yes. I probably wouldn't pass it now, but with some training….."

Strauss rolled her eyes and sighed.

"What's the bottom line here….? Are you going to let me back or are you just playing lip service to the team?"

Emily felt her fierceness resurface. If anyone was going to bring it out of her, it was the woman sat in front of her.

"Do you have any idea what _you_ did to your team?"

The venom in Strauss' voice took Emily aback and she didn't know how to answer that, so Strauss continued.

"Over the last few months your team fell apart. I was this close to disbanding them and putting a new team together, it was only Agent Hotchner's perseverance that stopped me."

"It wasn't my fault that Doyle came after me."

"Not your fault? Whose fault was it then? Only you can answer your conscience as to whether what you did undercover was appropriate, but what ever you did do, bought the issue to this team. Do you really think they will get past that?"

"They've all said they want me back….. I wouldn't be here if I didn't think they did."

"Maybe they're pleased to see you now, but what about when the novelty wears off and they remember how you lied to them? Will they trust you Emily is the bottom line.

Strauss' words really stung…. She knew that they would have all suffered, but to the point where the team was nearly broken up? She had no idea. She felt herself waiver and a pain in the back of her eyes….. but she would not cry in front of Strauss…. She would never give her that satisfaction.

"Are you going to let me try to pass the assessments or not?"

"Only to please Aaron and the team, but believe me, I will make sure they put you through your paces. This will not be easy."

"I wouldn't expect anything less of _you_." Emily couldn't help herself.

"This is a close team…. Too close most of the time for my liking. I will not allow your presence to disrupt them anymore…. One foot wrong Emily and you will never be allowed in a Federal building again. I promise you that."

Emily's blood was boiling. She wanted to explode and scream at the woman before her, but she knew that would mean game over. She dug her nails into her knees to subdue herself.

"Will that be all?"

"Yes."

As she left the room, she looked around….. She wasn't sure what for. She ran to the bathroom and stood in front of the sink. She held on to the basin and took some deep breaths. What Strauss said was whirling through her mind…. Was she right? Could they ever get past this? She had no idea whether she was doing the right thing.

After splashing her face with cold water and steadying herself, she went to find Derek.

She walked over to his desk and as soon as she saw him it made her feel better seeing the smile on his face.

"Hey, how did it go?"

"Ok….. She' s gonna let me take the tests."

She thought there was no point in telling Derek exactly what Strauss had said. He'd probably end up telling Strauss exactly what he thought and he'd be next on her list to target.

"Well that's good right?"

"Yeah, but I've got some work to do. I'm in real bad shape."

"Well, I will help you…. You want to go home now?"

"It's ok, I can get a cab. You're working."

"No, I squared it with Hotch. I'm going to finish for the day."

"Are you sure that's ok?" Strauss' words of not disrupting the team screaming in her head.

"Yes….. and I'm taking you to the movies."

"The movies?"

"Yes. When was the last time you went to the movies?"

"I have no idea."

The movie did manage to take Emily's mind off the events of the day and when they got home, she was in a much better mood. She went straight upstairs to get changed and when she got back downstairs, Morgan was sat at the table, busy writing on a piece of paper.

"What you doing?" She asked.

"I'm drawing you up a training schedule… we will get you in shape in no time." He continued to write, not stopping to look at her….. "It will all depend on where you're at now, so tomorrow we can go out for a run and see what you can do. And don't worry Emily, I don't expect you'll be able to do much at first but….." He quickly realised that he was getting no response from her so looked round to find her. She was sat on the sofa with her back to him. He could see her shoulders slouched and her head bowed down. He went and sat beside her.

Putting an arm around her shoulders he said, "What's wrong?"

"I just don't know if I'm doing the right thing in trying to come back."

"Why not….? I told you everyone wants you back."

"Strauss told me what I did to you all….. You were all nearly broken up because of me."

"No we weren't. Don't listen to that woman."

"She hates me you know? She isn't going to make this easy for me."

"Well, we'll just have to make sure we beat her then. All of us will help you do that. She won't win I promise you."

She stared at him, into his dark eyes. She couldn't believe how lucky she was to have him support her the way he did. She leant in and kissed him allowing her hands to snake around his waist and under his shirt. The kiss was deep, but sweet and she allowed her hands to roam all over his back.

He reciprocated and placed his hands on her slender arms, stroking them up and down tenderly. He then let his fingers move down to her waist, touching bare skin under her t-shirt. As he did she flinched. He pulled his hands away quickly….."Em, I'm sorry… I understand if you're not ready."

Her all consuming eyes looked at him, pleadingly…. "No Derek, I want to it's just…"

"You're scars….." He said softly.

"They're horrible."

Pulling her into a hug her said, "Come here…. They're not horrible, I already told you that."

"You can't say that. You haven't seen them."

"Show me then." He whispered into her ear.

For a couple of seconds she stayed perfectly still. He wasn't sure whether he had said the right thing. He then felt her hands take hold of his and place them at the bottom of her t-shirt. She wrapped his fingers around the fabric and he knew exactly what she wanted. She looked at him and nodded her head, just slightly.

He slowly lifted the T-shirt and as he did, she put her arms in the air to allow him to take it over her head. As he did, he didn't take his eyes off her face. He let the T-shirt fall to the floor and continued to look into her eyes. She was breathing heavily and he knew this was a huge deal for her to reveal her scars. She gave a small nod again, giving him permission to look down. He slowly moved his gaze from her face down her neck and to the first scar on her chest. He didn't let his expression change….. that would definitely upset her. He then continued down to her stomach. He placed one finger on the scar and gently rubbed it. He then looked back up to her and moved in to kiss her on the lips. He stayed there for a few seconds and then planted small kisses all along her jaw line and down her neck.

He felt her breathing rate increase, and her hands caressing the back of his head. He continued along her collarbone and then down to the first scar. He placed small butterfly kisses all over the scar and then moved back up to her lips….. "You ok?" He whispered into her mouth.

"More than you can know." She said with a huge smile across her face….. He had missed those smiles… he always felt they were just for him.

"Come on, I think it's time we went to bed." He said taking hold of her hand and leading her up to the bedroom where they took their time enjoying each other into the early hours of the morning.


	5. Chapter 5

"Derek! Stop. I need a break." Emily spluttered breathlessly.

He stopped dead in his tracks and turned around to look at her. She was leant up against a tree, bent over, gasping for air.

He walked back over to her, "You ok?"

"No, I'm pissed off. I used to be able to run up that hill without even breaking a sweat. Now I can barely breathe!"

Morgan chuckled.

"What are you laughing at?" She scowled at him.

"You Emily, getting all ratty. You have barely walked for the last few months. You can't expect to just be able to do what you could before. It's going to take time."

"I know…..It's just really frustrating."

"The problem with you Emily is that you want everything yesterday. We'll get there in no time if we stick to the schedule I set you."

She smiled inside at the fact that he said 'we'. She knew he wouldn't leave her to do this alone.

"Oh yes, the schedule. So what we got next?"

"Gym tomorrow. I'm going to work you up into a proper sweat."

"Is that a threat or a promise Derek?" She said laughing, remembering how they used to flirt like this all the time.

He smiled and put his one arm around her bare shoulders planting a single kiss on her forehead.

"As regards tomorrow, it's definitely a threat. Tonight however…" He didn't finish the sentence, just winked at her. She rolled her eyes to give the impression she wasn't impressed at all, whilst on the inside she was giggling like a little schoolgirl.

"So what do you fancy doing tonight Em?"

"Are you not sick of me yet?"

"You're kidding right? We've got five years of dates to make up for."

"I guess. But I need an early night. Got a big day tomorrow. Gym and then my session with Rossi to go over the psyche eval questions."

"Oh, ok." He replied and she could hear the disappointment in his voice.

She turned and grinned at him, "Hey, you're welcome to get an early night with me if you want you know."

"Well I am pretty tired." He said faking the biggest yawn she had seen.

"Derek, it's two in the afternoon."

He just laughed at her and pulled her alongside him to make their way back down the hill.

,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

Derek had dragged Emily out of bed real early in the morning so they could get a session in the gym at Quantico before he had to be in work.

The session had gone as well as he had hoped he thought strolling into the bullpen right on time.

"Morning Morgan."

"Hey Reid, how you doing?"

"I'm good." Reid responded with a smirk.

"What's up with you kid?"

"Nothing." Truth was Reid hadn't seen his friend this happy for a long time and knew the exact reason for this chirpiness.

"Hey Morgan." Rossi called as he walked across the bullpen towards Morgan's desk. "Is Emily here yet?"

"Yes, she'll be in any minute. We've just been in the gym and she's getting a shower."

"How's she getting on?"

"Good, although she's being all narky because it's not happening as quickly as she'd like it to, but she's doing well."

"Good. I hope she's ready for this session. I don't know whether she's going to like this too much."

"What's the plan?"

"Well I'm going to ask her the questions in one of the interrogation rooms. Reid is going to watch from the viewing room to pick up on her body language and how she answers the questions. We're going to have to see how transparent she is so we can iron any kinks out."

Both Rossi and Morgan turned to look at Reid as he called out, "Emily!"

Reid was beaming as she walked in through the glass doors. Reid's reaction every time he saw her since she was back was the same. He was always pleased to see her, like a child seeing his favourite aunt.

"Hey Reid." She said softly, enveloping him in a hug. The hugs she gave him were her way of trying to make it up to him bit by bit.

Rossi touched her gently on the arm, "So, are you ready for this?"

"Yes. I think so."

"I need to prepare you Emily. I'm gong to ask you some difficult things because that's exactly what they will do. If you want to stop at any time you can, but just remember that if you do that during the tests, they will probably fail you."

"I know. I'm prepared for that. Well as much as I can be."

"If you're going to get it wrong or get upset, now is the time to do so."

"I know Rossi. Let's just get on with it."

"Ok, Reid's going to be watching and will make some notes."

Emily just nodded, smiled and looked at Reid. Then she turned her gaze to Morgan who had a frown on his face.

"What's the matter?" She asked him quietly.

"What about me? I want to help."

"You mean you want to listen?" Rossi asked him.

Morgan's face turned to anger, "No Rossi, I want to help."

Rossi turned to Emily and shrugged his shoulders, letting her know it was up to her.

She looked Morgan in the eyes. She could see him looking at her questiongly.

He knew she had always been able to talk to Rossi and had shared things with him that no one else knew. Morgan didn't like that, feeling left out, especially now that they were 'together'. It wasn't that he was mad with Rossi, he just resented the fact that she could talk to him more freely.

"Sure, if you want to help, that's fine." Emily said lightly touching his hand.

"You sure?" He asked knowing that she was uneasy with this.

"Yeah."

She wanted to build her bridges with Morgan and knew that showing him this level of trust would go some way, even if it meant him hearing things that would be difficult.

,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,

Reid and Morgan stood on the one side of the one way mirrored glass. They had stood there many times, but never to watch a friend being interrogated. Emily sat on one side of the table, with Rossi on the other. Her one leg was tapping on the floor and her fingers shuffling on the tabletop. That was the first habit they would have to address.

Rossi had started off softly, asking about events that had led up to the Doyle saga and her disappearing. She had answered the questions just as Rossi would have wanted her to. So far she had done well, but they had really only just scratched the surface.

Rossi took a deep breath before continuing, "The things you did with Doyle when you were undercover, some would say crossed a line. How do you feel about what you did?"

Reid looked over to Morgan. He could see Morgan was completely absorbed in watching Emily and wandered if he really wanted to hear what she was about to say.

Emily put a hand to her forehead and rubbed it as if trying to sooth herself.

"I crossed a line, that's certain, but it was a moral line and not a professional one. Sometimes in this kind of job you have to think about the greater good. I did what I had to do to take down a terrorist. I'm not proud of it, but if I had my time again, I'd do the same."

"And how do you think your team will deal with knowing what you did?"

"I hope that they will see me as a stronger person for it and I know that I only did it because of the extremity of the situation. I think they all know I am not a cold person. That was just a job. Nothing more and I have no intention of getting involved in anything like that again. I just want to be here with this team forever."

Those words plucked at the heart strings of all three men. They could all see how desperate she was to be back with them. And that's why all three of them were doing this. They wanted her back just as badly.

"Tell me, do you think your team will be able to accept you back after the deception surrounding your faked death and events leading up to your disappearance?"

Both Morgan and Reid shuffled uncomfortably watching the look of horror creep across Emily's face. She looked at Rossi wide eyed so he reached over and touched her hand and whispered, "Emily, you have to be able to answer this stuff….. Go on."

She looked at him and nodded, accepting of what he was saying.

"Yes I do. I did have to deceive them and it was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. They were….. They are like my family. In fact they are the only true family I have known and felt safe with. They understand that what I did was to protect them all."

"Do you think that they believe that you wouldn't do that again?"

"I can't tell you what they believe, but what I can tell you is that I have promised to answer any questions they have about what happened. In our line of work, there are some things that cannot be shared and everyone here is a professional and understands that."

"Yes, but you say they are like family. Can you distinguish between what you should do as family and what you should do as a professional? Can the two live hand in hand?"

That question stumped her and inside she was getting flustered. She knew what Rossi was getting at. She knew that Strauss wasn't happy at how close the team was.

"Yes, I believe they can. Me not telling them about Doyle was professional and absolutely necessary. They accepting me back and forgiving me is family."

Reid looked on at Emily and smiled proudly. As she said those words, it all kind of made sense to him.

"Who do you think will find it hardest to trust you again and what will you do to overcome that?"

Emily now shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Morgan wasn't particularly happy with the line of questioning Rossi was going down and wandered if he really needed to go so deep.

He watched as she hung her head down to stare at a spot on the table in front of her. She then lifted her head and stared straight into the mirrored glass as if she could see straight through it and into Morgan's eyes.

"The person who I think will find it hardest to trust me again is Morgan." She continued to stare straight at him for a few seconds and then turned to look a Rossi.

"Carry on." He willed her.

"Morgan was pretty much my partner for five years and if I'm totally honest, my best friend. I can truthfully say that I haven't trusted anyone in my life the way I trust that man. He is good through and through and I never told or showed him how much I appreciated him. I guess may be I took him for granted. He was always there for me when I needed him. When I found out Doyle was on the run I wanted to tell him, but instead I hid it, like I always do. He reached out to me knowing there was something wrong and all I did was shut him out and at times I was curt with him. Even after I did that he tried everything he could to try and help me. He opened up to me and I know that wasn't easy for him…."

Her voice started to break as the tears appeared in her eyes.

"Why do you think you didn't tell him?"

"In my life I have always dealt with everything myself, afraid to let people in." The tears were now streaming down her face. Morgan and Reid wandered if she had even noticed. It was painful watching her straining to get the words out in between sobs.

"I wanted to reach out to him, but I didn't know how. I have never known how to reach out to anyone."

Morgan felt a pain in the pit of his stomach. The thought of her feeling so alone, even with them around her made him both sad and angry. He was angry with her family for making her that way. He could never imagine a life without the love and support of his family and he was just beginning to realise that she had never experienced that.

"And how do you think you will overcome that and make him trust you again?"

"I will make sure he knows how I feel. I will be honest with him from now on. There will be no more secrets, even if it's things I think he won't want to hear. I will pretty much have to bare my soul to him."

"And do you think you can do that?"

She looked over to the mirrored glass again, "I think I have started to do that already and I will tell him anything he wants to know. I owe him that much. He saved my life and he has spent the last six months beating himself up believing that he hadn't. I can't do enough to make up for that."

She looked broken and it was breaking the hearts of all of them.

Rossi's face softened into a smile. "Hey, I think that's enough for today. We'll stop now."

She raised her head and looked at him.

"Do you really think they will ask all of those questions Rossi?"

"Honestly? No, probably not. But you needed to get that out of your system Emily and know in yourself that we want you back and we do trust you. You just needed to convince yourself. Now, if anything like that does come up, you should be able to handle it just fine."

"Thank you." She said with a sad smile on her face.

"Emily, we do want you back more than anything and we will all do everything we can to get you back. You belong here…. Now I'm going to get back to work. You take a few minutes to get yourself together and I'll get Morgan to drive you home."

"OK."

Rossi left her and went to join Morgan and Reid.

"What do you think Reid?"

"I think you did a good job. Now we just need to do another session with real psyche eval questions. But I think you're right, now she's got that out of her system, she'll be just fine."

Rossi then turned to a quiet Morgan, "You ok?"

"Do you think you should have asked her some of that stuff Rossi?"

"Why, you got a problem with it?"

"I don't know man. It just seemed….. cruel."

"Morgan, if they so much as touched on those subjects in her evaluation, all that guilt would come flooding out of her. She would never pass."

"Yeah, I guess…. I'll go and make sure she's alright."

Conscious that both Reid and Rossi could see everything that went on in the interrogation room, Morgan stuck his head round the door and called Emily out, leading her to one of the more private rooms.

She had stopped crying, but her eyes were red and bloodshot.

"You ok?" He said taking hold of one of her hands.

"Yeah, I'm fine."  
"I didn't know he was going to ask you all that stuff you know."

"It's ok. I'm glad you heard it and I meant it all. You will probably get sick of me being honest with you." A grin appeared across her face. "If the sex is bad I'll have to tell you." She said letting out a little laugh.

"Hey, the sex will never be bad. I'm Derek Morgan. That's just not possible."

He pulled her into a hug and she nestled her face into his neck, giving him a little peck.

"Whilst I'm working on my honesty, you may want to work on your modesty." She whispered into his ear.

**Ok, I'm thinking of ending this story here as I'm not really sure where to take it now, unless anyone has any requests/ideas.**

**Thanks for all your reviews…. I have enjoyed writing this.**


	6. Chapter 6

Emily, JJ and Garcia sat in Garcia's lounge surrounded by half eaten pizza and two empty bottles of wine

"Gees, Derek would kill me if he could see me now." Emily smirked.

"Why?" JJ looked confused.

"I'm on a strict training schedule…'NO JUNK FOOD' is written in big letters at the top."

"He's written it all out for you?" JJ said eyebrows raised.

"Yep…. I feel like I'm in the army some days the way he barks orders at me. He loves it way too much."

"Derek Morgan in army get up, now that's something to fantasise about."

JJ and Emily looked at Garcia who was staring into space quite blatantly imagining Morgan in khakis.

"What?" Garcia squealed snapping out of her trance.

JJ and Emily laughed at her…

"Emily, maybe you should get him to dress up as a drill sergeant. It may give you more incentive."

"I don't know what you mean Pen."

"Don't give me that. I know that boy and I know you. Now spill. What's going on?"

JJ turned her gaze to Emily and widened her eyes, also willing her to speak.

Emily looked back at them both knowing there was no way out of this.

"He's been….. Well he's been really good to me since I've been back. Better than I could of wished for."

JJ and Garcia sat and stared at her waiting for her to carry on, but nothing else came.

"Good to you?" JJ questioned sarcastically.

"Yes good to me."

"How _good_ Emily?" Garcia giggled.

"Oh jesus, I don't feel comfortable talking about this right now."

A frown crept across Garcia's face, "Don't you trust us?"

Usually that sentence wouldn't have phased Emily, but with everything that had gone on, it sent a small wave of panic through her.

"No, of course I trust you guys. It's just, we haven't talked about…." Her voice trailed off as she became aware that there as no way out of this other than to lie, and that was not an option.

"Look, me and Derek haven't talked about telling everyone. I didn't want to go behind his back."

She looked at her friends and watched big grins appear across their faces. JJ reached across and placed one hand on her friend's knee, "It's ok Em, I understand, talk to him first….. but please know that I'm really happy for you."

Emily smiled back at JJ, knowing that she totally understood.

Both women were quickly distracted by a high pitched noise coming from the direction where Garcia was sat, "Screw that! I want to know what's happening. We've only had to wait like six years or something. Tell us and I promise we won't say anything."

"Penelope Garcia, there's no way you'll be able to keep quiet in front of Derek." Emily stated.

"Well, just tell him later…. Come on."

Emily looked at JJ for some support but it didn't come. JJ just sat with a smirk on her face, just as desperate to hear what Emily had to say as Garcia.

"OK, ok, I'll tell you…. "

Emily proceeded to tell the tale from the minute she had seen Derek when she got back to last night when they spent the night as her place.

"I'm so excited" Garcia said clapping her hands

Both JJ and Garcia looked at Emily watching her gaze fall to the floor

"Hey, what's wrong Em? Don't tell me you're having second thoughts already about you and him?" JJ said looking concerned.

"It just feels all too good to be true. When's he going to get mad at me? I know I hurt him and I don't know if he's gotten over that."

"What I do know Emily is that Derek Morgan wouldn't enter into a relationship with someone he works with lightly, in fact he wouldn't enter into a relationship with anyone lightly." Garcia said reassuringly.

JJ continued, "The problem here is that you still feel guilty and you don't think you deserve this, but you do. You both do."

"Thanks guys. I know I'm being irritatingly negative. I will snap out of it... oh and good job with the profiling JJ." Emily laughed.

"I did learn something from you guys you know."

"Well maybe when Emily's back with us, you can come back too. It's where everyone belongs."

Garcia half smiled and half had tears in her eyes. She had seen her family fall apart over the last year or so and was desperate for them to be back together. She hadn't felt so happy to be in the company of two people so much in a long time.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

JJ dropped Emily off at her place on her way home and smiled as she saw Derek's car parked out front. She didn't say anything to Emily, but the two women exchanged a knowing glance. As she kissed Emily goodnight on the cheek she squeezed her hand. "It's really good to have you home Em... now go and enjoy him."

Still with a smile on her face, Emily gently opened her front door. She could hear the TV on low and all the lights were off. Making her way into the lounge she saw a sleeping Derek sprawled out on her sofa. After watching him for a few seconds she gently touched his head and crouched down next to him. As he opened his eyes, she whispered, "Hey."

"Hi" He breathed back at her with a sleepy smile creeping across his face, "Did you have a nice time?"

"Yeah, it was good to see them both. Come on, let's get to bed. It's late."

"Come here first." And he signalled with a nod of his head for her to come closer. She leant in and gave him a sweet kiss. As she pulled out of the kiss she saw the questioning expression on his face.

"What?"

"I can smell pizza and taste wine."

"They made me." A small smirk appearing.

"Tut tut Emily Prentiss, you're going to regret that in the morning when we're training."

"You could go easy on me."

"No chance. I'm beasting you even more to work that off."

Scrunching her nose she muttered under her breath, "Great" and then he watched as a cheeky grin appeared, "We could do other things to work it off."

Laughing, he placed a hand around the back of her head and gently stroked her hair, staring at her intently, "Why didn't we do this sooner Em?"

"I dunno. We're both pretty rubbish at this stuff, that's probably why."

"Yeah."

He stood up and held his hand out to her. As he lead her away she slightly tugged on his arm, "Oh, I've got another confession."

"Oh yeah?" he said continuing to walk up the stairs towards the bedroom.

"Yeah, um…. I kind of told Garcia and JJ about us and I know I should have talked to you first, but they know anyway and Garcia wouldn't leave it…."

He sentence was interrupted when Derek stopped, turned and placed one finger to her lips, "Shh. It's ok, I knew Penelope would get it out of you. The woman can read me like a book. We just need to keep it from everyone else until you're back with us. If Strauss gets a whiff of this, you know she won't let you back."

"I know. You better have a good talk with Garcia then. You know what she's like."

"I will. Come on….bed time."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

On the day of the phsych evaluation Emily stood with Rossi, Reid and Morgan in Rossi's office.

"You ready for this Emily?" Rossi asked.

"No, when are you ever ready for something like this. But I'm as ready as I'll ever be thanks to you."

"You'll be fine if you stick to what we practiced… and remember to look whoever asks you the questions in the eyes… and no fidgeting."

Emily laughed, "I know…. Ok I'm off, wish me luck."

They all watched as she left the room, Morgan wishing he could say more to her before she went in, but knew he had to keep his distance.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Emily sat in the interview room knowing that them keeping her waiting was all part of the mind games. As she fought the urge to tap her fingers on the desk in front of her as Rossi had said, she heard the door handle turn and she looked up. Watching who walked into the room her jaw dropped.

"Why are you here?"

"I'm conducting the evaluation. Jenkins is outside watching and will also be evaluating."

"Are you kidding me?"

"No Emily, I am not kidding you. I'm the Section Chief. It makes sense."

"And when exactly did you last do an evaluation?"

"Quite frankly Emily that is none of your business. The way you're carrying on, there will be no evaluation at all. Now do you want to do this is or not? Because I could quite happily walk out of here and not bother."

Emily took a deep breath and thought about the reasons she was doing this… She pictured her team, her family and the place she wanted to be more than anything. Almost shaking from the anger building inside her, she relented, "Ok Chief Strauss, I'm sorry. Can we just get on with it?"

Emily could just see the tiniest of smirks cross Strauss' face as sat down on the opposite side of the desk to Emily and lay out some papers. She shuffled them around a bit, not saying a word. Then she started writing on one of the forms, Emily trying to glance at what it was she was writing, but it was too far away.

As impatient as Emily was getting, she managed to subdue the rage. She knew full well Strauss was doing this in an attempt to make Emily boil over and Emily wasn't about to let her succeed.

After a few minutes Strauss looked up from her papers, "Ok, let's begin… a few routine questions to begin with and then we'll move on."

The questions Strauss asked weren't taxing, after all Emily had been over these several times with Rossi, so she sailed through.

"Right, let's move on to events surrounding you leaving this team. Just a little background first. Tell me what happened from the moment you found out Doyle had escaped… what you did and how you felt."

Again, this bit was easy. She had gone over it that many times with different people, it just rolled off the tongue.

"Now let's get on to you coming back to this team. Tell me why exactly you want to come back."

Emily looked Strauss in the eyes, "Because this is where I belong. I made a difference on this team and I was good at my job."

"And how do you feel about your colleagues?"

"They are some of the most incredible professionals I know. Every one of them is the best I know in their field and this country is a better place for having them working together."

"And on a personal level?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's a simple question Emily. How do you feel about them personally? You can distinguish between the two?"

Emily began to roll her eyes, but realised quickly that was not the best thing to do. Instead she firmly fixed her eyes on Strauss'.

"I care about them all. You don't work on a team for five years and not form bonds with people."

"You care about them….? Is it not the case Emily that you want to come back here because these are the only people who care about you? I've leaned a lot about you since your disappearance and it seems to me you have no-one else to turn to. My concern is that you are desperate to come back here because you have nowhere else to go and I don't know if that is the right reason to have you back."

The words stung… they stung because they were true to an extent.

Emily took a small gulp and fought the tears she could feel building.

"I want to come back here because I was good at my job and I can help to save people's lives and put the evil monsters out there behind bars. The fact that I care about the people on this team and they care about me is irrelevant, although I do believe a good thing. A team who don't care will end up stabbing each other in the back and quickly fall apart."

"And you don't think they may feel you stabbed them in the back? Or that you are capable of it with what you did?"

Emily's face did not falter. The hours of questions with Rossi had definitely paid off, "I know they don't feel that way."

"You seem very sure."

"I am. That's what comes from knowing and caring about who you work with. If they didn't want me here or didn't trust me, I would know."

This line of questioning continued for a while, but Emily did not falter.

Strauss put her pen on the desk and closed shut the file she had in front of her.

"Right, that's the end then." Strauss said getting up.

"Well, how did I do then?"

"I have to speak to Jenkins first. The two of us must agree before deciding."

"So, what do I do now?"

"Go home. I will have someone call you with the results. If you've passed this, you can do your physical in a few days."

Strauss got to the door, stopped and looked back, "Oh and you can tell Agent Rossi he did a good job. Those were text book answers you gave."

Before Emily could respond, Strauss was gone. Was that a good or bad thing? She didn't know.

She walked out of the interview room and into the Bullpen where no-one was to be seen. Picking her phone up off Morgan's desk she could see she had a couple of missed calls from him. She dialled his number and after a couple of rings he answered,

"Hey"

"Hi"

"We got called out on a case. How'd it go?"

"Ok…. I think."

"You think?"

"Yeah. Oh I don't know. Strauss did it."

"What!"

"Yeah, I'll tell you about it later. There's no point in stressing about it now. All I can do is wait for her call. She says if I pass this I'll have the physical in a few days."

"Really? Well, no more junk food and wine for you missy."

She let out a small giggle, "Yes sir."

"I love it when you call me sir."

"Well don't get used to it… and can't anyone hear you?"

"No, I'm on my own."

"Good. Do you think you'll be back tonight?"

"Yeah I should be. We're only local. I'll give you call later ok?"

"Sure. See you later."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Later that evening Emily lay in a hot bubble bath attempting to wash away the day. She could just about manage five or ten minutes without going over each question from the evaluation. She knew Strauss had already made her mind up and was just making her sweat by not calling her today.

Closing her eyes, she sank further into the hot water so most of her face was covered, just leaving enough for her to breathe. She felt herself drifting off and as she did the door to the bathroom opened causing her to jump out of her skin and almost out of the bath, water and bubbles going everywhere.

She looked up at the figure in the door way.

"Jesus Christ Derek, what are you doing? Haven't you heard of knocking?"

He didn't say anything. Just looked and laughed at her.

"I thought you were going to call?"

As he walked over to her and knelt down beside the bath she noticed the flowers in one hand and chocolates in the other.

A sweet smile crept across her face, "Flowers and chocolates? We're turning into a cliché."

Putting the flowers down on the floor, he used one finger to brush away the bubbles on her nose.

"I don't care if it's a cliché. You've had a shitty day and my mom says no matter what a girls says, flowers and chocolates will always cheer you up."

"Your mom? I guess she's a wise woman. But I thought I wasn't allowed junk food." She said nodding towards the box of chocolates.

"Well, I'll make an exception tonight."

"Why, that's very kind of you."

"I know."

He grinned and leant over the side of the bath to kiss her gently on the lips.

"You know what would be even better Derek?"

"What's that?"

"If you fed them to me… whilst joining me in here."

He raised his eyebrows at her and then stood up and walked out of the bathroom quick pace.

"Where are you going?" She shouted to him.

"Well I can't get in in my suit can I?"

She lay back and smiled… He had already managed to take her mind off Strauss and her day.

**Ok, I wasn't really sure where to go with this after the last chapter, but I think there's certainly another chapter in this now to see if she does get back on the team… thanks for all your comments and encouragement. And I'm so sorry this took so long.**


	7. Chapter 7

The following day Rossi stood in the bullpen with Reid and Morgan going over some papers from their last case, tying up loose ends.

A familiar voice caused all three men to look up from what they were doing.

"Dave"

"Erin. What can I do for you?"

"I thought you may like to be the one to deliver the news, as it was certainly your handy work that got her through it."

"What are you talking about?"

"Emily….. I don't need to be a profiler to know you coached her through that evaluation."

"Erin, I have no idea what you're talking about, but I take it she passed then?"

Strauss' face turned even more sour as she watched the tiniest of smirks appear on Rossi's lips.

"Yes, she passed."

Reid and Morgan looked at each other with satisfied smiles. Morgan just wanted to pick the phone up to Emily right then, but Strauss wasn't finished.

"So you want me to tell her?" Rossi asked a little confused.

"Yes… and tell her I've managed to get her booked on a physical test this afternoon."  
Strauss' head turned as fast as a bolt of lightning as she heard a confrontational "What?" coming from Morgan's direction.

"You have something to say Agent Morgan?"

"Yes. You can't just dump it on her with a couple of hours notice. You told her it would be in the next few days."

"I can do what I like Agent Morgan. You would do well to remember that."

"But…."

Rossi held a hand up to Morgan and looked back to Strauss, "Erin, I'll call her now. She'll be there this afternoon."

Without saying a word, Strauss turned and walked out of the bullpen.

Rossi turned to look at Morgan who was shaking his head, "This is bullshit. She's doing everything she can to stop Emily coming back. Why didn't she just fail her on the physch eval?"

"Because she couldn't. You heard her. Emily gave text book answers and there is a second evaluator to make it fair."

"So why didn't you say anything about the physical to her Rossi?"

"Because Strauss is right, she can do what she wants. If Emily isn't fit enough today, she won't be in a couple of days. May be this is better. She won't have time to get nervous about it."

Both men looked quizzically at Reid who was quietly chuckling.

"What's so funny Reid?" Morgan asked slightly irritated.

"I'm just glad I'm not the one who has to tell her. She isn't going to be happy, although I would like to hear what expletives she uses to describe Strauss."

"Morgan, do want the job of telling her?" Rossi said smiling at him.

"Me? Why me?"

"Because you've been helping her train. She will probably need you to explain to her she'll be fine. She's not going to listen to me. The last time I put on a pair of sneakers was…. Well I can't actually remember which is rather worrying, but anyway, you should tell her."

"Gee Rossi, remind me to repay you the favour."

As Rossi turned away, Morgan could have sworn he saw him give him a little wink, but he wasn't sure. Though it wouldn't surprise him at all if Rossi had figured them out.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Sat in Rossi's office, Morgan dialled Emily.

"Hey." He heard her soft voice mutter.

"Hi. How you doing?"

"I'm just getting breakfast."

Morgan looked at his watch, "Breakfast? Emily it's eleven o'clock."

"Yeah well I slept in."

"You were awake when I left."

"I fell asleep again. I had a late night remember?"

Morgan smirked, "Yes I was there too. But some of us had to work this morning."

"Oh didums…. Anyway, why are you calling?"

"What, I'm not allowed to call you for no reason?"

"Of course, but I thought the days of you checking that I was ok were gone, so what is it?"

Morgan realised that this could be a pitfall of going out with a profiler, especially one as good as Emily.

"Ok ok, I have called for a reason. I have some news. Some good and some not so good."

"Right, go on then."

"Strauss came to see us this morning. She said you passed the evaluation."

There was short pause at the other end.

"Really?"

"Yep really. That's great right?"

Unconvincingly Emily replied, "Yeah great…. But what's the bad news?"

"I didn't say bad Emily, I said not so good."

"Whatever Derek, just get on with it."

"You've got to come in this afternoon for your physical."

"What!" Morgan removed the phone from his ear by a short distance as the volume of Emily's voice had suddenly increased. "I swear to god, if I don't pass this physical I'm going to tell that witch exactly what I think of her. In fact, no I'm going show her!"

"I know, I know, but there's no point in getting wound up right now. Concentrate on the physical."

"But Derek I'm not ready. How can I do it this afternoon?"

"Emily, you are ready. I'm not worried about you. We're ahead of the training schedule. Don't stress."

"Don't stress! Are you kidding me….? And you made me eat those chocolates last night."

Derek laughed down the phone to her, "If I remember correctly, _you_ made _me_ feed them to you. Anyway, we haven't got time for this. Have your breakfast and get your butt over here."

"Hang on, why did Strauss get you to call me?"

"She didn't, she asked Rossi to."

"What and he got you to call me? Am I that scary?"

"No, he just thought that because I'd been helping you train it would be better coming from me."

"Oh right." Emily said unconvinced.

"Well ok, I think may be he's guessed about us, but it doesn't matter… remember the no fraternisation rule was practically bought in because of him."

That managed to get a little laugh out of her, "Ok, I better get ready then."

"Ok... see you later."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Emily made her way in to the locker rooms at the training ground and sat on one of the benches to compose herself. As she did her phone beeped. She looked at the message from Derek.

'_Good luck Em although you don't need it. You are more than ready. You have been amazing the last few weeks. Call me when you're done. I love you. D xx'_

She sat smiling at the message, but was soon interrupted by the voice of one of the PT instructors.

"Prentiss. You ready?"

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Reid watched as Morgan tapped his pen on the desk and checked his watch and phone every few seconds.

"You know she'll be fine Morgan."

"Yeah I know. I just want her back here so bad."

"We all do."

"I know."

"You know, there is a spot where you can watch the physicals without being seen."

Morgan looked at Reid, eyebrows raised. "And how would you know that? And more importantly, why would you need to watch without being seen? In fact don't answer that, I don't wanna know."

Reid chuckled, "So you wanna go or not?"

Morgan looked up to Hotch's office. He was buried in paperwork. Rossi was no where to be seen.

"Ok kid, let's go."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Morgan and Reid stood on the bank overlooking the training field.

"This kind of feels wrong Reid… watching her without her knowing I mean."

"Well if we'd of stayed in that office any longer, you'd of bore a hole in that desk. Why are you so stressed about it anyway?"

"I just know how much she wants this, and if she doesn't pass I don't know how she'll handle it."

"Morgan, there she is." Reid pointed to down to where they could see Emily running.

"She's on the final run. She should be done soon." Morgan muttered to himself.

"Well she looks like she's doing fine."

"Yeah, as long as she gets in under the target time."

Morgan watched as Emily quickened her pace and sprinted to the finish point. A smile crept across his face. She really didn't look phased.

"Let's go down and see her Morgan. See how she did."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

As Emily walked back to the locker room, she saw the two men walking sheepishly towards her.

"Hey, what are you two doing here?"

"We just wanted to see how you'd done and Morgan was getting real impatient."

Morgan looked at Reid with a frown and nudged him in the ribs. "You better be careful kid or I'll tell everyone about your little secret you just revealed to me."

Emily looked at them both confused. "What the hell are you on about?"

"Nothing." Reid quickly interjected.

"Anyway, so come on then. Did you pass?" Morgan asked impatiently.

He knew as soon as the smile began to creep across her face that she had.

"Yes I passed."

Morgan stood there wanting to pull her into a hug, but knew he had to hold back. Besides, Reid would have beaten him to it anyway. As Reid hugged Emily, she looked over his shoulder at Derek and mouthed to him, '_Thank you…. and I love you too_.'

Derek smiled sweetly back at her.

Pulling out of the hug with Reid, Emily walked over to Derek, but stopped just a foot shot of him. Not being able to thank him properly was killing her.

"Thanks Derek. I really couldn't of got through this without you."

"That's ok. And for passing I'll buy you the biggest, most calorific pizza I can find."

Reid watched as his two friends did all they could to not let on what was going on between them. He was happy to let them think they were fooling everyone, but in truth they were fooling no one.

"So how do you think Strauss is going to take the news guys?" Reid said interrupting their little moment.

Derek scoffed, "She's quickly running out of ways to sabotage your return."

"I dunno. She could always make me do my firearms authorisation blindfolded."

Derek chuckled, "I am definitely not worried about that. You could shoot a gun blindfolded, hand tied behind your back and upside down."

Both Reid and Emily stared at him with a slight look of horror.

"Is that some sort of weird fantasy Morgan?" Emily asked sarcastically as she started to walk off.

"We better get back Morgan before Hotch misses us."

"Ok Reid I'll catch you up in a second."

As Reid walked away, Morgan took a few quick strides to catch up with Emily.

"Hey, what was all the 'Morgan' business?"

"What do you mean?"

"You called me Morgan."

"I always call you Morgan."

"Not since. Well you know since…." And he waved his finger between the two of them.

"Oh, I see. I'll have to call you Morgan here won't I?"

"I guess. This is going to be weird isn't it?"

Emily giggled, "Yes, but let's face it, neither of us are ever going to do things the easy way are we?"

Morgan stared at her with a goofy grin. "I guess." He leant in a little closer and lowered his voice, "You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now."

"Really?" Emily said scrunching up her nose, "I stink."

"Yep… stink and all."

"Well holding back is definitely something we're going to have to learn to cope without while we're at work."

Laughing, Derek leant back away from her. "Yeah that's going to interesting. Well I better get back, I'll see you later."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Emily stood outside Strauss' office. She had kept her waiting for half an hour, no doubt for no good reason other than to piss Emily off.

The door opened and Strauss signalled for Emily to follow her into the office, not saying a word. Emily took a seat opposite the sour faced section chief.

"Well Emily, it looks like you've done it."

"What do you mean?"

"You've beat the system. I'm sure you're very proud of yourself."

"Beat the system?"

"There's no way in my mind you should be allowed back on to this team with everything you have done, but you have passed all the assessments and my hands are tied. You can start back a week on Monday. Your firearms authorisation will be next week, which I have no doubt you will pass with flying colours."

"If you don't want me back here so bad, why can't you stop it?"

"Because you were never removed from your post. For me to do that I would need a reason. But you passed everything, so there's nothing I can do. But believe me Emily I will be watching this team very carefully. If I see any signs of an issue, I will not hesitate in taking action. Do I make myself clear?"

Emily was feeling a mixture of pure joy that she was back with her team, but still felt like jumping across the desk to punch Straus. She took a deep breath and looked Strauss straight in the eyes, "Yes crystal clear."

Emily began to stand up, "Will that be all…. Ma'am?"

Emily could have sworn Strauss almost snarled at her as the sarcastic tone of her 'ma'am' echoed the room.

"Yes Agent Prentiss, that will be all."

Emily turned and hot footed it out of the office, unable to subdue the huge grin beaming across her face. She made her way straight towards the bullpen, but on the way was Garcia's office. Emily stuck her head round the door.

"Hey Pen."

Garcia turned and looked at Emily with the look of excitement she had every time she saw her, as if she still couldn't believe Emily was real.

"Emily!"

"You know those cup cakes you've been bringing in for the team every Monday morning?"

"Yeah." Garcia looking rather confused, wandering if Emily was going to ask for the recipe.

"Well, next week, you need to make one more."

Garcia stared at Emily with a slight confused frown for a couple of seconds and then Emily watched as her face lit up.

"Oh my god! You're coming back to us?"

And before she knew it, Garcia had jumped across the room and Emily was enveloped in a Penelope hug.

"I can' believe this is happening. Have you told the others?"

"No, you're first Pen."

"Really? Come on then."

Garcia grabbed hold of Emily's hand and dragged her down the corridor and into the bull pen. She made a bee line towards Morgan and Reid who both looked up at the same time hearing the fuss Garcia was making.

"What are you two up to tonight?"

Morgan and Reid both looked at Garcia confused and then over to Emily who stood and shrugged her shoulders with a smile on her face.

"Er nothing Penelope. Why?" Morgan asked.

"Because we're having a party at my place to celebrate this one coming back to us."

Morgan smiled at Emily but before he could say anything, Reid piped up, "Did you speak to Strauss? Are you definitely coming back?"

"Yep, I start a week Monday."

Morgan stood up, again having to fight the urge to go over and pull her into him.

"Well that definitely deserves several drinks then." He said grinning at her and even managing a little wink.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Garcia managed to get the whole team to her place that night plus JJ.

Rossi stood up and coughed to get all their attention.

"Right, it looks like I am the toast master for this team, so I thought I'd say a few words before we enjoy the rest of the night. We all know why we're here. Finally Emily is coming back where she belongs."

Rossi turned to look straight at Emily. "The last few months have been torture for all of us, including you. Then a few weeks ago when you walked back into our lives and that cloud of darkness was lifted. We have all been anxious the last few weeks hoping that you would make it back on to the team and to be honest I have no idea why we worried. You are Emily Prentiss, certainly not a force to be reckoned with. You are an amazing woman and I think I speak on behalf of everyone, that there is no other place that we want you to be."

Fighting back the tears, Emily could just about manage a few words, "Rossi that means so much to me. I don't even know what else to say other than thank you to all of you. I couldn't have made it back without you….. and I'm really no good at this stuff, so can you all stop looking at me before I turn into a sniffling wreck."

She could hear a few giggles from around the room and she felt Derek's hand rub her leg reassuringly, out of sight of everyone.

"OK, here's to Emily guys." Rossi said raising his glass.

A chorus of 'Emily's' echoed the room and just as everyone thought he had finished, Rossi continued, "Oh and one more thing, here's to Morgan and Emily."

Derek spat out the swig of beer he had just taken from the bottle he had in his hand and started to cough. Emily looked at Rossi wide eyed as knowing glances and smirks were exchanged by everyone in the room apart from Hotch who was frowning.

Rossi looked at the two agents who looked horrified and quickly continued, "Morgan for supporting Emily since she's been back, helping her to pass the physical and convincing her we all want her back and Emily for not taking Morgan's head off every time he barked orders at her. Now, everyone, there's drink to be drunk."

Rossi winked at Derek and Emily before making his way over to the kitchen to get himself a refill. Hotch followed behind to join him.

"Dave, what was that all about?"

"What?"

"The Morgan and Emily thing? Is there something going on between them?"

"Oh come on Aaron, are you saying you haven't noticed?"

"They're close, I know that, but I didn't know for sure. This could cause a real problem if Strauss finds out."

"She won't. They can be discreet. They both need this Aaron. Let's worry about it if it becomes an issue. But I don't think it will be. Talk to them if it makes you feel better, but not tonight eh?"

Hotch nodded, "OK."

Emily walked over to sit next to JJ who was looking a little sad. She placed one hand on her shoulder gently as she sat down.

"Hey you ok JJ?"

JJ smiled back at her friend, "Yeah. I bet Rossi had you sweating then didn't he?"

Emily laughed, "Yeah, I guess everyone knows right?"

"I think so, although Hotch looked a little confused."

"Oh right. I guess we'll have to speak to him."  
"Yeah that would probably be a good idea."

"So, are you going to tell me what's up?"

JJ's eyes looked down to the floor, "I just miss all this Em. I miss being part of this team. My new job's ok, but it doesn't compare to working here. I miss everyone."

Emily snaked her arm around JJ's shoulders and pulled her into her.

"Why don't you talk to Hotch? They never replaced you on the team and I know we struggled without you. And now Seaver has gone, technically there's a free spot. Just speak to him. It can't hurt right? He never wanted you to go."

"You reckon it's possible?"

"I don't know, but if Hotch can persuade Strauss and the powers to be to let me back, you should be a walk in the park."

JJ let out a little laugh, "Thanks Emily. I'll talk to him."

Morgan watched Rossi and Hotch talking, sipping nervously on his beer. As soon as Hotch walked away from Rossi, Morgan went over to join him.

"Rossi, what were you playing at back then?"

"Morgan, do you really think everyone doesn't know what's going on with you two? I just wanted to acknowledge that we're all happy for you."

"Is it that obvious?"  
"Only to us because we're your friends. Don't worry, no-one here will let on about this. You can trust us all. It's better we know than you have to lie to use right?"

"I guess."

Rossi held his hand out to Morgan who looked down at it and then back up to Rossi. He took the man's hand who gave it a good shake, "Congratulations Derek. You're a lucky guy. She's special."

"I know. It's kind of scary."

"Well, just make sure you make the most out of this. We all know time is precious and don't make the same mistake as I did and let this job get in the way. My door is always open…. Don't be proud to ask me for advice. I have made many mistakes in my time so take advantage of that and learn by them."

"Thanks Rossi. I will… and don't pull a stunt like again, I nearly choked on my beer."

Both men laughed and joined the rest of their friends for the night.


	8. Chapter 8

_A few weeks later…_

"Clear!" Morgan shouted, running into the lounge of the two story house the team had just invaded. Two women had been killed and one was still missing. This was the last lead they had to find her and the clock was ticking.

"Clear!" Hotch shouted from the kitchen.

"Clear!"… Reid

"Clear!"… Rossi

The four men convened in the lounge and there was silence for a few seconds. It was broken however when a loud crashing noise and a voice was heard coming from upstairs, "FBI…. Put your weapon down now!"

"Prentiss!" Hotch shouted looking up towards the ceiling.

In unison, the four men made a dash for the staircase, Morgan making it there first. Sprinting up the stairs, two steps at a time, they made their way towards the source of the sound in the back bedroom. As they did a gunshot rang out sending a shockwave through them all.

Morgan ran to the doorway, closely followed by Hotch, and stopped as he surveyed the scene. He let out a deep breath which he had held in from the moment he heard that gunshot.

"Ahhhhh!" Proctor, the thirty something male, screamed out. "You bitch!"

"You're lucky you didn't get a bullet between the eyes Proctor, but I want you to pay for this. Killing you would have been giving you the easy way out." Emily said as she hovered above the unsub who was on his front lying on the floor. She grabbed his hands roughly and pulled them behind his back, slipping on the cuffs.

She looked up and over across the room, "You ok?"

"Yep." JJ answered untying the young woman Proctor had held captive.

Both women looked to the doorway as a little cough could be heard escaping Hotch who had positioned himself just inside the room.

"You two ok?"

Emily smiled, "Of course. What took you lot so long?"

"I think you two had it covered."

"Yeah, but I could with a hand with this one now."

Morgan immediately slipped past Hotch and went to kneel down opposite Emily on the other side of Proctor.

She looked at him with her big brown eyes, "I shot him the arm. He had a knife. We need to get some pressure on the wound."

"Sure." Morgan allowing his eyes to linger on her a little longer than necessary. He then picked up a rag off the floor and tied it around Proctor's arm to stem the bleed.

"C'mon, let's get him out of here." Morgan said, standing up and pulling the unsub up with him.

"Jesus christ! First that bitch and now you. You don't have to be so rough man! I have been shot!" The cuffed male shouted at Morgan.

"That _bitch _could have killed you_._"

"What, I'm supposed to be grateful?"

"Oh no. She just made sure that you will spend the rest of your life in misery rotting in jail. Best thing she could have done. Now come on."

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

A very tired team walked back into the BAU. The case has lasted four days and they were all exhausted. JJ walked over to her desk and dumped her bag on it. She no longer had her own office and was now in the bullpen with Morgan, Emily and Reid after being promoted to a fulltime profiler.

Garcia practically ran over to them all, "My lovelies are all back unharmed. You know that feeling of worrying about my babies going out into the field never goes."

"I don't think you have to worry baby girl. These two had it all wrapped up themselves today." Morgan said motioning towards JJ and Emily.

"Oh having these two back just makes me worry more, but I wouldn't have it any other way… Unless you could all get desk jobs."

Morgan chuckled, "I don't think there's any chance of that. I saw the fire in their eyes as they took Proctor out. They've both got a few months of taking out the bad guys to catch up on."

"Morgan you're not suggesting I enjoyed shooting him are you?" Emily asked eyebrows raised.

"Of course not." Morgan laughed.

"Well I'm just glad you're both back. There was too much testosterone on this team for my liking." Reid said.

"Testosterone?" Morgan questioned, "You're not suggesting that you added to that are you kid?"

"Funny Morgan, very funny." Reid replied sarcastically.

All the others laughed as Hotch and Rossi joined them from their offices.

"You should all get home now. I know I promised you a couple of days off, but we've got another case. I need you all back in tomorrow first thing." Hotch said apologetically.

Looking around at his team, Hotch could see the rolling of the eyes from all of them, but knew that no-one would want to be anywhere else.

Emily watched as JJ made her way to the bathroom to wash her face before they left. Emily slipped away from the others to follow her.

As JJ entered the bathroom she heard a soft 'JJ' from behind her.

"Emily?"

"Hey, I just wanted to make sure you're ok."

JJ looked a little confused, "Yeah I'm fine why?"

Emily looked upwards and then back to her friend, "Actually, I just wanted to get you on your own to thank you."

"Thank me? What for?"

"This." She replied looking around her. "Being back here. Today taking out Proctor with you. It felt good. Like old times. If you hadn't of given me the strength to walk back through those doors a few months ago I wouldn't be here. I was so close to running away again."

JJ smiled sweetly, "You don't have to thank me Emily. You belong here. No question. Anyway, you did all the hard work to get back."

"With a lot of help from Rossi and Derek."

"May be, but you still did it. You wouldn't have gotten away again anyway. I'd of got Penelope Garcia on the case." JJ winked at her.

Emily smiled back and couldn't help but move a little closer to give her friend a hug.

Just as she did, the bathroom door flew open and the two women to pull away from other.

The woman that walked in gave an immediate disapproving look.

"Agent Jareau. I haven't had chance to speak with you since you came back. Have you settled in?" The Section chief asked, sounding nothing but insincere.

"Yes ma'am."

"Well you all seem pretty happy to be back together. Let's hope no-one ruins it this time."

Emily took a deep breath as JJ looked at her and widened hers eyes, telling her to calm down.

"I'm sure everything will be fine." The blond responded.

"I think it's time you got back to work Agents." The Section chief instructed.

Emily and JJ looked at each other and then back to the older woman,

"Yes Ma'am." They said in unison, the sarcasm certainly not lost on Strauss.

As they walked back out into the corridor they both giggled.

"She isn't gonna let this lie is she JJ?"

"She will. Just give it a bit of time. And keep your hands off Morgan whilst you're here."

"I haven't touched him."

"I know, but you may want to work on your body language."

"What are you talking about?"

"I saw you giving each other puppy dog eyes across the unsub earlier."

"You did not."

JJ did not respond, just laughed as they made their way back to the others, Emily following with a frown.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Derek and Emily entered her place and both dropped their go bags on the floor, not having the energy to carry them any further.

"I'm going to get a shower Em."

Emily turned to face him, "Hang on."

She walked over to him and slipped her hands around his waist, planting a soft yet long kiss on his inviting lips.

"What's that for?" He asked looking deep into her consuming eyes.

"I missed you." She said with a sleepy smile.

"Missed me? I've been with you for the last four days."

"Yeah but not like this."

"True. Sharing a bedroom with Reid really isn't the same as sharing with you."

"I should hope not!"

Morgan laughed.

"JJ said we were giving each other puppy dog eyes across the unsub earlier."

"No we weren't."

"That's what I said."

"Those were 'come to bed' eyes." He said widening his eyes and giving a wicked smile.

"What?"

"I forgot how sexy you looked holding a gun and taking down bad guys."

He winked as she gave him a playful tap on the arm, "Shut up Derek."

Laughing, he kissed her again and went to pull away, but she pulled him back into her.

"No, I don't want you to go anywhere." Giving him that sweet smile that he knew meant she wanted more of him.

"You sure? You're not too tired?"

"Are you asking me Derek or are you too tired?"

"Never… let me just get a quick shower. I promise I'll be real quick."

"Ok. I'll wait upstairs for you."

Derek walked from the bathroom and into Emily's bedroom with nothing but a towel on. The lights were off, but there was just enough light coming through the curtains from the moon to see her outline on the bed. He whispered her name but got no response. He tiptoed over to the bed and leant over, close enough to now see her face. She was sound asleep making Derek smile. He knew she'd be mad in the morning for him not waking her, but she always looked so beautiful when she slept. He wasn't going to disturb her.

He dropped the towel on the floor, climbed under the single sheet that covered her and let his arm snake around her naked waist. He shuffled his body so his chest was against her back and nestled his face in her hair.

He smiled to himself as he closed his eyes…. Finally everything was complete. She was where she belonged… In his arms and back at the BAU. No-one was going to take that feeling from him. From either of them.

As he started to drift off he heard a little whisper escape her mouth, "I love you Derek."

"I love you too Emily Prentiss."

The End….

**A/N**

**So I wanted to wrap up this story….. Sorry the chapter isn't too long.**

**I really enjoyed writing this story and it went on a little longer than I had anticipated… Thank you all for the encouragement with your reviews.**

**I would like to start a new story… not sure what yet. I was thinking of writing something about her coming back again but this time including taking out Doyle… I am however open to any other requests…. Something completely different or a oneshot if anyone would like… I'm always up for a challenge**


End file.
